Back at the beginning of the year I was sent a box. In that box sat four Satisfyer models. I’d already reviewed the original Pro 2 so knew I loved the sensations these toys provided, but I confess that I was a bit daunted by the thought of having a load more to try. Getting so much of the same thing all at the same time actually put me off using them until a short while back when I reviewed the Pro Penguin, and now it’s the turn of the Satisfyer Pro Deluxe.
Firstly, I love the appearance of the Pro Deluxe. It’s so different from the other shapes, reminding me of Wall-E’s Eva every time I look at it. Roughly egg shaped, it’s made from a matte, pale rose gold ABS plastic and white silicone, with a high-shine rose gold trim around the control button. From end to end it measures 4.5ish inches and it has a maximum girth of 7 inches.
Though it is a good quality build, there’s something that annoys me about the Pro Deluxe. All the channels between the plastic and silicone are probably 3mm deep, and they’re fucking gunk monsters. No matter how well I clean it (using a toothbrush) I still end up digging bits of flaky crap out of the gaps once the toy has dried. It seriously drives me insane.
Something else that had the potential to make me crazy is the charger. All rechargeable models of the Satisfyer come with magnetic USB charging cables, and we all know how much I love those. But luckily, the charger to toy connection is very strong and I’ve had no disconnection issues from this one at all.
While it’s charging a white LED light flashes, and once it’s complete that light stays solid. *SPOILER ALERT* I’ll tell you now that I haven’t had to charge this thing yet. I did the initial charge and that took ages (probably six hours) but I’ve not used it enough to flatten it.
Power-wise, the Satisfyer Pro Deluxe doesn’t offer anything the other models don’t. Eleven intensities, all of them accessed by the same button that turns the toy on/off. You can’t cycle back if you go an intensity too far. But once you get to the highest intensity, the toy will start to scroll back down if you keep pressing the button.
This is one of the reasons I prefer the Womanizer over Satisfyer; the Womanizer has the quick-click back to start feature that I find essential to my enjoyment and prolonged play with those toys. The Satisfyer is usually a one orgasm toy for me because I have to break contact while I reduce the intensity. I can’t just drop to a low hum while I wait for my clit’s sensitivity to settle enough for me to come again.
So, while the power and stimulation the Satisfyer Pro Deluxe offers is excellent, I knew as soon as it came out of the box that I was gonna have issues with it. See, unlike the other models which all resemble in-ear thermometers (the Penguin less so, but still…) the Pro Deluxe doesn’t have a ‘beak’. The silicone head doesn’t stick out and slip between my flabby labia like the ones on all the other models do.
This stimulation head isn’t removable, and it’s sunk into the body of the unit itself. It isn’t a protruding thing, it’s flat, a hole in the back of the toy. Because of the size of it, it’s near enough impossible for me to get it on my clit. My labia gets in the way, preventing proper contact, and when I do make contact it’s precarious. So easily broken by the smallest of movements.
If I hold my labia apart with my left hand and hold the toy with my right I can make good contact, but that just gives me two dead hands. And it makes the potential for hands free play dry right up. It’s a shame, really, because the pebbly egg shape is a nice size in my hand. It’s comfortable to hold, and I think that if it had a spout rather than a hole I’d love it.
When the Fella uses it on me I have much more fun. My hands aren’t involved, for a start, so I can do other things with those. But it isn’t just that. He can see what he’s doing, he can hold the toy and expose my clit with the same hand because of his vantage point. And he can prolong the agony for as long as he likes, whether that be jiggling it so I hover on the brink of orgasm, deny me altogether or force me to take the full intensity long after I’ve come.
Of all the models I’ve tried so far, this has been the worst. It’s not a bad toy by any means, it’s just rubbish for people with large labia. If you have an exposed clitoris, or just very small labia, it could be the perfect Satisfyer for you. If you’d like to find out one way or the other, click the banner below and pick one up from Simply Pleasure.
