As a blogger who is lucky enough to get to review products which various companies send to me free of charge, I have a personal rule that any product I haven’t paid for is to be reviewed within 30 days of delivery. I don’t get boxes full of stuff rolling in daily, and I don’t take for the sake of taking then make a company wait for 3 months because I’ve over committed myself.
So, now you know that, I’m guessing you can imagine how distressed I am that the Nexus Femme Bisous has been with me for over a month and is only now being reviewed. But that’s not because I took on more work than I could handle. I’ve actually tried writing this review four times, it’s just never felt right.
I’ll give you the reasons as to why in a minute or two, but first I’ll tell you about the Bisous itself.
Firstly, it’s gorgeously packaged. A very pink, damask printed sleeve protects a solid black box with the Nexus Femme branding and product name printed in pink and silver on the lid. The box is one of those magnetic ones, that stay closed, so there’s no danger of it popping open when you least expect it.
I’ve kept my Bisous (which means kisses in French) in its box cos I like it, but there is a decently sized velveteen storage pouch in there for those who don’t have room for boxes. There’s also a pink usb cable in the box too, as well as an instruction booklet.
When I first plucked the Nexux Femme Bisous out of its flocked plastic nest, I was surprised by its weight. It isn’t heavy by any means, but it feels sturdy and well made. About 80% of it is made from silky pink silicone, the other 20% being the white ABS plastic panel which houses the controls.
The usb charging point is located at the bottom of that white plastic panel, and is protected by a pink silicone tab. I’m not a fan of these tabs as I nearly always accidentally pull them off, but this one is well fixed, so I’d have to wilfully yank it to make it drop off.
As you can see from the photos, the Bisous is a rabbit-style vibrator. It has an insertable length of around 4 inches, and that lovely, bulbous shaft is 4.5 inches in circumference at the widest point. The clitoral arm is 2 inches in length, and super flexible! It can be bent every which way from Sunday, and it just springs back into place like it hadn’t ever been moved.
I’m definitely a huge fan of the shape of the Bisous. It looks sleek and kinda designer, and a million miles away from the Jessica Rabbits of the world. With the curve being quite pronounced, it feels bigger than it is once inserted, and I like big! But it’s a vibrator with a rotating tip, not a dildo, so the big question is, how good is it at its job?
Well, with the Nexus Femme Bisous, you get two speeds of one directional rotation, 3 vibration intensities, and 3 patterns. The vibes on offer aren’t too bad, if I’m honest. They are high pitched and buzzier than I’d like, but with the clitoral arm being so firm to the touch yet mega flexible, there’s a bit of a flicker in the tip that makes it feel a bit more powerful than it really is.
Getting it situated can be a bit of a bind as it doesn’t have the right dimensions for me, but once it’s inside me and manipulated to be touching all the right places, I can reach orgasm with it, but not every time. If I have it angled very sharply upward it strokes my G-Spot, but misses my clit. That clit arm does, however, vibrate right over my urethral opening, which is actually quite nice. I try not to do that too much though, cos UTIs love me, and I don’t want to encourage a visit.
Now the rotation function, which can’t be operated separately from the vibes, is a bit of a let-down. It’s slower than a slow death, and using it can be unbelievably frustrating.
I keep wishing it would just go a little faster, stroke my G-Spot a little more aggressively, but even the faster speed is still painfully slow in my opinion. I’m sure there’s a million people out there who would be delighted with such a slow, steady stimulation, but it drives me a bit nuts.
The only time I ever truly appreciate the Bisous is on those rare, precious occasions when the Fella reads my own erotica to me. I die whenever I read my own stories out loud, but getting a slow, steady G-Spot massage while my most favourite voice in the world utters words I obviously find hot totally gets my motor running!
We’ve done this with other, more powerful toys, but I usually race toward orgasm and lose my train of thought. The feeling of not being fucked, but gently stimulated while my mind is seduced is quite an erotic experience.
The Fella did want to read to me while I used the Bisous in the bath, but it’s only splash-proof, not waterproof. I wasn’t bothered by that, cos I don’t really love using toys in the bath. It does bother me that I have to take more care when cleaning, though. I like being able to dunk a whole toy in soapy water, but the Bisous needs to be carefully cleaned with wipes or a cloth sprayed with toy cleaner.
So, those are my thoughts on the Nexus Femme Bisous. There’s no way will this rabbit ever win a race with a tortoise (artistic license, people), but it does have a place if you’re looking for a toy to use during gentler, more intimate moments. I just really wish it moved faster. Click the button below if you’d like to pick one up for yourself.
