In less than fourteen weeks’ time, Scandarella will be celebrating its 2nd Blogiversary. Yep, I’ve been at this for almost two years, and do you know what? I’m still discovering products that I never knew existed, some of which make me piss my pants with laughter and others that soak my drawers for a different reason altogether. One product in the latter category is the My Fucsia Pop Skull Porcelain Dildo.
My Fucsia is a maker of ceramic sex toys, situated in the Umbria region of Italy. Their products are the brainchild of designer, Emanuele Pangrazi, who has a vision of breaking sex taboos by creating a range of pleasure objects that can be placed on display as vaguely erotic ornamental pieces.
I’ve seen a lot of talk on their website and online profiles about their ‘dildo d’arredo’ – roughly translated as dildo furniture – approach being unique to them. But it isn’t. I’ve seen this in other ceramic sex toy companies, and also some glass ones, too.
I love My Fucsia’s designs, though I wouldn’t personally put one on my mantlepiece. Don’t get me wrong, I’m all about smashing the shit out of taboos that surround sex toys and their accoutrements. But I don’t ever want to have the ‘well, that’s an interesting piece of art, tell me about it’ conversation with my parents or the Fella’s seventy-year-old uncle.
No, when I first spotted the My Fucsia Pop Skull Porcelain Dildo I didn’t see an ornament. I saw something funky that I could fuck, and since it arrived that’s exactly what I’ve been doing with it.
So, the first step was choosing my design. Okay, that’s a lie, there was never any doubt that I’d go for anything but the Pop Skull. It’s basically girly me in a dildo. Skulls, flowers, and butterflies in pink, purple and baby blue on a white background…it literally screamed PICK ME as soon as I opened up the page, and I literally screamed HOW COULD I NOT back at it.
But, if I had been less narrowminded about what I wanted, I’d have had a decent pool to choose from. My Fucsia dildos are separated into four categories, each consisting of four identically sized dildos, some with different textures but all with different designs:
- Premium – a choice of either fully or partially gold plated, all of which are completely smooth apart from the King, which has some sexy looking texturing around the tip
- Aliens – four bizarre, somewhat childish looking creatures, all of which have smooth shafts and the same texture as the King
- Nautilus – super funky submarine designs in four different colours, each with a raised spiral wrapping around the shaft
- Pure – skulls, leopard print, flowers and butterflies, all in pinks, purples and blues on white, and all completely smooth
When my pick arrived, I had a big smile for the packaging. A hot pink cardboard tube that I can store my dildo in forever that doesn’t take up a load of space on the shelf. I’m becoming quite the fan of this kind of packaging, it’s pretty, neat and tidy.
I admit that, once I had the dildo in-house, I questioned my decision to choose a smooth shaft. I’m not usually one for a straight up and down, untextured dildo, and I wondered if I’d been hasty in choosing appearance over sensation. But, then I opened the tube and as soon as I had the Pop Skull in my hand my worries melted away.
It’s a torpedo-shaped dildo with a tapered tip, and it narrows slightly near the base before flaring back out again. At 8.25” from base to tip it’s nice and long, and the girth around the upper half of the shaft is a reasonably filling 5.25”.
Every inch of it is smooth and supremely polished, though I can feel the design with my fingertips. The transfers won’t come off, though. I’ve given the My Fucsia signature that adorns the base a good scratching, so I know it isn’t going anywhere.
Something I’m not keen on about the build of these dildos is the base. Like many porcelain ornaments, it has a hole in it. I’ve inadvertently jammed my finger in that hole during use, and I can tell you it isn’t fun. Getting it back out again took some pulling. Thank god for silicone lube is all I can say.
If I intentionally put my finger in the hole I can feel that the inside isn’t glazed. It’s just bare ceramic. I know nothing about the making of porcelain things, so I’m only assuming that it’s the glaze which keeps these dildos non-porous and therefore body safe. The idea that I’m getting body fluids and lingering bacteria in that hole, or that mould might be forming after I’ve washed it and gotten the inside wet, really icks me out.
I feel like a shit having a nit-pick about this, but it really does bother me. I mean, I know I don’t use the inside for anything at all, but would it really have been so hard to cover it with a disc the way Persian Palm does, or even stick a rubber bung in there like Pipedream do with their Ceramix range? The latter would give the user an option to fill their dildo (which is hollow) with hot or cold water, thus making it extra excellent for temperature play.
Anyway, aside from that hole, the My Fucsia Pop Skull Porcelain Dildo is a well-made thing. And in use, it’s brilliant.
Like I said above, I didn’t really expect to love this as much as I do. I thought it would be a bit boring, but it isn’t. Because of the super slick nature of the glaze I don’t need to use a great deal of lube with it, but I do appreciate that I don’t have to stick to water-based. A thin coating of Uberlube lasts for ages and I’ve never had to stop to reapply. The tapered tip helps with insertion, but because it bellies out to its widest point so quickly those who aren’t used to or don’t like thicker toys might struggle.
That’s because of the absolute rigidity of it, and that rigidity is exactly why I love this dildo. It’s solid. Unforgiving. It pushes its way in and won’t let anything stand in its way. A lesson in angling was quickly learned when this thing whacked my pubic bone. I need to pull the base back, which I won’t complain about cos, even though the lower half of the shaft is slender (3.75”) the sharp angle lets it stretch my opening in a way it wouldn’t if I went in straight, and it also puts the tip in contact with my g-spot.
I can insert it, rest the base against the bed, and rock my hips to make the tip rub my hotspot. Because my hands are free, I can either use a clit vibe for a quick finish, or my fingers if I want to let things build slowly. Masturbating in this way really suits me, cos I’m lazy. If I can get internal stimulation from a toy that I don’t have to hold, I’m happy. This dildo is perfectly suited for that.
At first, I was worried about using the My Fucsia anally. I wasn’t sure the flare was flared enough. But, after having a good long think about it, I decided that it’s okay. Like I said earlier, the ‘neck’ is 3.75”, and the upper part of the shaft and rim of the base are both 5.25”. That’s a 1.5” flare, so I’m happy with that.
Which is a blessing, cos this dildo feels great when used anally. It has a similar shape to a butt plug, just bigger and with a handle. One thing that irks me about plugs is being unable to thrust so that I get repeated stretching and shrinking. The Fella can do this for me, but I can’t do it myself, my fingers always slip off the base. But the My Fucsia Pop Skull Dildo lets me do that, and the sensation is exactly what I like. Plus, because it’s an 8” dildo, I get to go in deeper than I would with a plug. So, I get to have the best of both worlds.
Cleaning this dildo is simple, if you don’t obsess over the hole in the base. Soapy water, toy cleaners, wipes…all of them do the job nicely. I’m a saddo, so I’m considering getting a bottle brush to clean the inside. I just want to be sure, you know? And once everything is clean and dry, back in its tube it goes until next time.
I really do love my Pop Skull Dildo, and would love to try a textured version. I’m imagining the bumps of an alien grinding away at my g-spot. Or the spiral of one of the Nautilus adding magic to anal play. Whatever design or texture tickles your fancy, click the banner below to go see them all.
