Do you remember the review I did of the awesomely designed Emojibator Eggplant Vibrator back in April? It made me smile but didn’t have what it took to make me come. Well, when I received that toy, I also received its sibling, and I think it’s high time I reviewed it. So here are my thoughts on the Emojibator Chili Pepper Mini Vibrator.
Unlike the Eggplant, which came on a card mocked up as a mobile phone screen, the Emojibator Chili Pepper comes in a box. It’s nothing out of the ordinary, but I have to mention the little smiling chilis that are printed on one side, and Emojibator’s bold “Go F*ck Yourself. Literally,” slogan that’s emblazoned on the other. If I was mooching around a sex shop it would definitely catch my eye, so yay for that!
The Chili itself is adorable. Seriously, I love the little thing to death. Made from primary red and bright green silicone, it’s the perfect representation of the cute emoji that stands in for the penis in those spicier sexts we send.
What I like most about it is the shaft. The Eggplant was perfectly smooth, but the Emojibator Chili Pepper has a bit of texture. It isn’t defined or pronounced texture. In fact, to look at the shaft is flat, but if you turn it in your fingers you’ll feel six veins running from top to tip. They softly mimic the actual shape of a chili with little bumps and dips.
You wouldn’t think it, given that I’m not a friend of small insertables, but this detailing makes the Chili feel rather nice when it’s inserted shallowly into the vagina and twisted. I’ve taken to using it when I have an e-stim probe or love egg inserted deep inside me and it really adds to my playtimes. I didn’t expect that at all!
Just like its veggie basket buddy, the Emojibator Chili Pepper is battery operated. It takes 4 cell batteries and that makes me sad. They’re rubbish for vibrators, and while triple A’s are just as bad they have one thing going for them; they’re easy to source. Cell batteries aren’t so I wish manufacturers would quit putting them in sex toys.
Again, just like the Eggplant, the Chili has three constant speeds and seven patterns, all of them accessed by the single push button that masquerades at the Chili’s stalk. And you have to cycle through all ten options before you can turn the vibrator off. That wouldn’t be such a bind if the Chili was awesome, but these vibes are not good vibes.
They’re very weak and nowhere near good enough to get me near a clitoral orgasm. Do you have pubic hair? The vibes from the Chili feel like scratching your nails lightly over the skin between your legs, the tugs on surrounding hairs making the sensation feel broader. I find it pleasant some days, itchy others, but never orgasmic.
The Fella is a fan, though. He likes tickly vibes and that’s exactly what this is. The silky smoothness of the silicone feels great against his skin, and that pointed tip works wonders on his perineum. I lube it up (with water-based lube only) then kinda jab it against him and wiggle it in circles, letting the shaft catch his balls or dropping the tip to tease his anus before massaging his perineum again. But I don’t put it up his butt, though, cos it has no flare so isn’t anal safe.
I honestly thought I’d misplaced it when I came to write this review cos I couldn’t find it, but it was in the Fella’s top drawer with flat batteries. Good for him for using it on his own, but bad for me cos battery buying is my job.
To clean your Chili all you need to do is give it a quick wash in a sink of soapy water. It’s 100% waterproof so you needn’t worry that you’re gonna kill it. Feel free to take it in the bath with you if that’s your thing. Once you’re done and it’s clean, you can either stick it in the travel case Emojibator offers separately (if you’ve bought one) or stash it in a bag in your toy box. It doesn’t attract a lot of dust/lint/pet hair so won’t get all grungy on you if you decide to just chuck it in your drawer.
I personally wouldn’t recommend the Chili Pepper to anyone unless they told me they were specifically seeking a gentle vibe for a sensitive clit. The Fella readily recommends it to anyone who likes their balls buzzed, their perineum massaged or their frenulum tickled. If you fancy bagging one for your toy box, click the image below and go check it out.
