Sliquid Shine Intimate Toy Cleaner

As a rule, I try not to review consumable products. Lubes, condoms, sprays, etc. Reason being, I end up with loads of open bottles and so much stuff goes to waste. But when I was offered the chance to review a handful of Sliquid products I couldn’t say no. I mean, the fact that I’m a huge Sliquid fan is pretty much old news. The first product I’m gonna talk about is the Sliquid Shine Intimate Toy Cleaner.

When this stuff first arrived, I was delighted. I’d expected to receive a squat little bottle that would only last me a week, tops. But no. Sliquid Shine comes in a rather large spray bottle which is black and gold and sleek. And unlike most other toy cleaners there is a whopping 255ml (8.5oz) of product inside.

Sliquid Shine black and gold spray bottle on black background

Sliquid are famed for their organic, vegan, shit free products, and Sliquid Shine does its best to keep up. On the front of the label, it states that the spray is 95% organic. And when I check the ingredients I can’t see anything that makes me wanna contradict. In fact, with the entire ingredients list comprising of just organic aloe juice and organic tea tree, castor, and jojoba oils, I’m wondering how it’s only 95%. Continue reading “Sliquid Shine Intimate Toy Cleaner”

Tantus Steam Hunk Super Soft Dildo

Is steampunk your aesthetic? Do wires, nuts and bolts get your motor running? Does the idea of filthy exploration in a far-flung space station make you long for lift-off? Or, do you just love getting your orifices around a good, chunky dong? If you say aye to any of those things, you need a Tantus Steam Hunk Super Soft Dildo in your life.

Copper Coloured Tantus Steam Hunk front side view on cream background

You may or may not know that Tantus reigns supreme at the top of my fave dildo makers list.  In my last Tantus review (this one) I said that the day had to be coming where I tried a dildo of theirs that I didn’t like. Today is not that day. Continue reading “Tantus Steam Hunk Super Soft Dildo”

Fleshlight Go Torque Ice Masturbator

Before settling down to write this review I had to repeat a short mantra in my head. Don’t make this all about me, don’t make this all about me. I mean, Fleshlights are, first and foremost, penis masturbators and I don’t have one of those. The thing is, this particular toy – the Fleshlight Go Torque Ice – is such a treat for the eyes I can’t help but want to wax lyrical about how much I bloody fucking love it.

The Torque isn’t the first Fleshlight the Fella has tried. We’re both fans of the Freaks series with their monstrous designs. But it is his first toy from the Go line and to be quite honest with you I don’t know why it took us so long to give one a shot. Continue reading “Fleshlight Go Torque Ice Masturbator”

Shunga Aphrodisiac Warming Oil

Okay, so I know that the last thing y’all probably want to read about in this glass melting heat is a warming massage oil. To be honest, it’s the last thing I’d usually want to use at any point during the summer months. But, thanks to a few skin complaints, I’ve had this super pretty bottle of Shunga Aphrodisiac Warming Oil taunting me since January, and now that my skin problems are much improved actual balls of fire couldn’t have kept me away from it.

Shunga Aphrodisiac Warming Oil glass bottle with Japanese art packaging

As ever, Shunga has delighted me with their beautiful presentation. The familiar Shunga couple is exactly where I’m used to seeing them, gracing not just the outer tube but the label on the 100ml bottle, too. Their clothing is green in this instance to match the colour of the oil. Continue reading “Shunga Aphrodisiac Warming Oil”

Satisfyer Pro Traveler Clitoral Stimulator

Are you a sex toy lover who travels a lot? Do you ever look at your collection and think, which of you lovely wee things are going in my suitcase? I know I’d be like that if I had to go anywhere, I couldn’t be without at least one toy. I also know that, should I get the chance to pop off on holiday or even for a weekend away, I’ve found the very toy I’ll be rolling up in a pair of knickers. Yep, the Satisfyer Pro Traveler is the one that will travel with me.

Satisfyer Pro Traveler packaging on pink and white background

I’ll hold my hands up now and say that I didn’t think I’d ever find a Satisfyer product that beat my beloved Womanizer. But the Pro Traveler is so perfect for what it’s designed for I can’t help but think that I might have. I thought that the Womanizer Starlet was the perfect pint-sized air pulse travel companion, but this one has it beat. Continue reading “Satisfyer Pro Traveler Clitoral Stimulator”

Rocks Off Vortex

I love putting stuff up my butt. It’s a cold, hard fact that the orgasms I get via anal penetration are always stronger than any vaginal based climax I have. If you pop into Scandarella often you’ll probably know that I adore big and implausible toys for anal. It probably seems like I spend all my days straddling stuff the size of traffic cones. I don’t, though. Just as it is with dildos, I sometimes need a smaller, less challenging toy, and one such product that came to me in recent months is the Rocks Off Vortex.

Now, I’m not the biggest Rocks Off fan in the world. Don’t get me wrong, I think their stuff is always gorgeous, always well designed, and always well executed. And I had a passionate love affair with their bullets back when my mild interest in sex toys first morphed into an obsession. But with time their vibes became less effective for me, so now they’re pretty much exclusively for the Fella’s use, with exceptions, of course. The Vortex is one of those exceptions. Continue reading “Rocks Off Vortex”

We-Vibe Anniversary Collection

A couple of months ago, I was sent the loveliest of gifts from one of my favourite brands; We-Vibe. This awesome company has just recently celebrated a milestone anniversary. Ten years of spreading sexual happiness with gems like the Nova, Ditto, and of course the iconic Tango. To mark the occasion with style they released a limited-edition two-piece set featuring two of their most prized products. When getting starry-eyed over the set specific colours I realised I’ve yet to write any kind of detailed review about my beloved Tango, and as one of those babies comes in this set I thought it was high time. So here are my thoughts on the We-Vibe Anniversary Collection.

As I said above, this set comprises of two products. Alongside the Tango is the cream of We-Vibe’s wearable vibrator crop, the Sync and its remote control. You might be wondering what’s so special about bundling two already well-received products together, and I’m gonna tell you. Continue reading “We-Vibe Anniversary Collection”

Fun Factory Bück Dich

What happens when one of your favourite sex toy brands gives a nod to one of your favourite metal bands? The Fun Factory Bück Dich, that’s what. Yep, in homage to their fellow German icon, industrial metal band Rammstein, Fun Factory has brought us one of the most spectacular spankable-insertables ever.

Translated from German into English, Bück Dich means ‘bend over’ and it’s the title of one of Rammstein’s songs. Give it a listen (and read the translation if you, like me, don’t speak German) and you’ll see that it was made to be given the kinky toy treatment. Continue reading “Fun Factory Bück Dich”

Lovehoney Lifelike Lover 8″ Silicone Dildo

As regular Scandarella readers will probably know, I love big ol’ dildos. I love to have ‘em big in every direction and I absolutely adore enormous fantasy stuff. But sometimes, when lying in bed alone in the middle of the night, I don’t want to be hefting pounds of silicone around and giving my arms a wanky workout. I want simple, light, realistic, and hard. The toy that’s been satisfying those needs for me in recent weeks is the Lovehoney Lifelike Lover 8” Silicone Dildo.

By fuck, is this thing pink. It’s so bright it has a frigging aura. I’ve said many times that pink is a boring colour for sex toys, but these days I think that this 80s-esque neon is actually kinda cool. I’ve got some bold colours on my dildo shelves but this one has to be the most eye-catching. Continue reading “Lovehoney Lifelike Lover 8″ Silicone Dildo”

Vixen Creations Gee Whizzard

When it comes to non-fantasy silicone dildos, my trifecta of favourite brands is Tantus, Fun Factory, and Vixen Creations. Each one offers something different, whether it be size, shape, or simplicity. As a rule, it’s the ultra-realistic Vixskin I look for when checking out Vixen’s wares. I love that stuff so much, it’s the most realistic feeling silicone I’ve tried to date. But Vixskin isn’t all Vixen have to offer, though. They still make toys in their ‘original formula’ silicone, and that’s what this gorgeous Vixen Creations Gee Whizzard is made of.

I’ve wanted to get my hands on one of these bad boys for ages, so was past myself with excitement when the very lovely Carolyn from Betty’s Toy Box offered to send me one for review. See, I’m one of those less than sensible people who insert their Doxy into their vagina on occasion. I don’t endorse the practice cos it ain’t good for the wand and it’s only fun until you have to take it back out again, but I won’t lie and say it doesn’t feel incredible. Continue reading “Vixen Creations Gee Whizzard”