Erotic Advent Calendar

Whenever I’ve had advent calendars they’ve always been either chocolate or candles. One time, I had a wooden one that the Fella filled with small ornaments for the tree but bugger knows where that went. Though I’ve seen sexy advent calendars before, I’ve never had an opportunity to try one…until now! Yep, the lovely folks at Orion have sent me this rather large Erotic Advent Calendar to plough through this December, so I’m gonna do something different…

Instead of ripping the whole thing open and glutting myself on its contents, I’m gonna do it properly. A box a day, for 24 days. If you knew how much will it’s taking me to not peek you’d probably be shocked. I’m a notorious scratch ‘n’ sniffer who looks in all the nooks and crannies for hidden presents and I’ve even been known to snuffle around in pockets looking for receipts. I know, I’m so ashamed. Continue reading “Erotic Advent Calendar”

Diogol Jaz Pony Plug Whip

As you may know, I’m a big fan of sex toys that are more than one thing. Not long back they weren’t easy to find, but over the last year or so there’s been an explosion of them. Mostly, they’re an impact toy on one end, then when you flip it you find that the handle is something insertable. I’m always keen to give them a go when I come across them, so was delighted to discover that French company, Diogol, had released a new line of products called Jaz, and in it is a couple of these double enders. They sent me a big package of stuff, and now that I’m spotting them for sale I can get reviewing! I’ll start with the Diogol Jaz Pony Plug Whip.

If you’re into small anal toys you’re gonna love the Pony, because one end of it is a sweet petite butt plug. If floggers are your thing (or even tails) you’re in luck because that’s exactly what dangles out of the end of said plug’s base. Dildo ended floggers have been called floggildos, so what would a butt plug version be? A plogger. Or a flug, maybe? I dunno, I’m no good at these things at all. Continue reading “Diogol Jaz Pony Plug Whip”

Wild Thing by Zado Leather Whip

A few days ago, the Fella took a leisurely stroll through the pages of Scandarella. He reckons it’s safer to remind himself what we have in the toy cupboard by reading my toy box page than it is to try his luck opening the cupboard doors. While he was browsing, he commented that it’s been ages since I last wrote a review of an impact toy. He was right, the last one was a flogger kit I made way back in July! I think it’s high time for a new review in that department, so I’m gonna tell y’all about the gorgeous Wild Thing by Zado Leather Whip.

Of all the impact toys we have, I think our whips see the least amount of use. Not because they’re less enjoyable than say, paddles, but because they’re awkward to use. So often they arrive, and we find they’re so lightweight it feels like trying to thwap someone with an ostrich feather. Even when we get a good heavy one their uber long length means they’re gonna be tangled in the curtains or the light shade before they get so much as a sniff of skin. Continue reading “Wild Thing by Zado Leather Whip”

Loving Joy Universal Harness & Dildo

Every so often, Sex Toys UK adds another string to the bow that is their Loving Joy range of sex toys and bondage gear. So far, we’ve seen a bullet that gets to sit at the head table with the We-Vibe Tango, a flexi vibrator that’s more versatile than waffles, and a whole host of anal plugs with gems and bushy tails. The latest of the range to pass through the doors of the Scandal household is the Loving Joy Universal Harness & Dildo Combo.

When I was offered the chance to review these two products (which are currently sold separately but may be available as a bundle soon) I was a little hesitant. I’m not a small woman, and I expressed concerns that the harness might not fit my size 24 (UK) body. But the lovely Louise from STUK explained that, when sourcing a harness for the Loving Joy range, it was crucial that one be found which catered to a wide range of sizes, including my size and beyond. Continue reading “Loving Joy Universal Harness & Dildo”

E-Stim Systems EClips Bi-Polar Surface Electrodes

Since I discovered sex toys and really took the time to get to know my body, I’ve found that orgasms happen quite easily for me. I used to have to put in a shit load of work and often whatever climax I had would be lacking, but these days I come quickly and I come hard, whether I’m playing clitorally, vaginally or anally. But one thing I really wanted to learn was how to come via nipple stimulation, but it never happened. Until I got a decent e-stim kit, that is. The E-Stim Systems ElectroPebble gave me my very first nipple induced orgasm, and thanks to that company’s lovely owner, Mick I have something that has made my nips a regular source of orgasmic pleasure. So now, I’m gonna tell you all about the E-Stim Systems Bi-Polar EClips.

But first…

!!MASSIVE DISCLAIMER!! Continue reading “E-Stim Systems EClips Bi-Polar Surface Electrodes”

Kandles by Kitten Vamp Wax Play Gift Set

When I do a review, I often start with a bit of the old, ‘did I love it or did I hate it, read on to find out’ lark. But not today. Nope, today I’m going straight in with the love. Because this Kandles by Kitten Vamp Wax Play Gift Set is awesome, and I’m not even gonna bother pretending it might not be.

When I got back from lunch this afternoon, I started taking a few final photos for this very review. What was supposed to have been a few drips for pics turned into an impromptu hot wax session that ended in a crumbly quickie with the Fella on the bathroom floor. I love how these candles feel, so I should have known that things weren’t ever gonna end any other way. Continue reading “Kandles by Kitten Vamp Wax Play Gift Set”

Red Minx Vibrator by Shiri Zinn

I’ve been such a lucky duck, recently. Some gorgeous sex toys have passed through the doors of the Scandarella household, one of the most recent being the i-Scream ice cream cone vibrator. I love everything about that darling little thing, and now I’m getting to talk about another product from the mind of the same person who designed it. Let me introduce you to the Red Minx Vibrator by Shiri Zinn.

From the moment I ripped the tape off the outer box and saw what was lying in wait among the packing paper, I was smitten. The packaging for this thing is next level stuff. You folks know I’m a self-confessed packaging whore, and the box the Red Minx comes in delights me. Some toys come with pretty paperboard cartons, some with plastic cases. But the Red Minx? This baby comes in a satin lined, faux snake print covered, hand-crafted box. Scarlet and blood red, sturdy, and with a silver clasp to keep it closed. Gorgeous! Continue reading “Red Minx Vibrator by Shiri Zinn”

Black Label Collection Liberator Wedge

Look at this gorgeous Black Label Collection Liberator Wedge, people. It’s a simple thing, really, just like all of Liberator’s other stuff, but it’s one of the best sex-based products I’ve ever had the pleasure to own. Let me tell you why…

One of the things I do as an erotica writer, is try to keep sex real. Sex is messy, for a start, no matter how you do it. It’s noisy, sweaty, sometimes awkwardly awkward, other times awkwardly funny. Cocks slip out, orifices that have been pumped full of air tend to fart at the worst possible moment. And then there’s having to pause to reach for lubes and condoms, or toys if you use them. Sometimes there’s discomfort, or there’s folk coming too early or not early enough or not at all. And that’s all before you consider mismatched heights, leg cramps, rolling off butt elevating pillows, falling off the bed and making a window in the wardrobe door with your fucking face… Continue reading “Black Label Collection Liberator Wedge”

Kink Craft Paracord Flogger Kit

I’m starting this review in a state of excitement. An eager little beaver with a goal in mind. See, usually I’d get to know a product inside and out, taking copious amounts of notes and working from them to help build what I have to say. But not this time. This time, I’m writing the review as I get to know the product, because I’m making it. Yep, it’s time for me to pick up my Kink Craft Paracord Flogger Kit and get stuck in, and I’m bringing you along for the ride.

First off, the kit comes in such a pretty box! I love the way Kink Craft present their kits. Paper lined, ribbon tied boxes, they come ready to present to whoever the maker-bee might be. If you’ve bought a kit, you’ll get everything you need inside that box. The only things you’ll want to have to hand are stuff like scissors, a ruler, a lighter. You may or may not need a craft mat, depending on your chosen product, but I use one each time I make something from Kink Craft. Continue reading “Kink Craft Paracord Flogger Kit”

Bad Kitty Corset Paddle

It’s no secret that Bad Kitty is one of my favourite brands. Their stuff ranges from subtly serious to fun and funky, and there’s a good chance that, if you have a browse through Orion’s pages, you’ll find a piece or two that calls to you. The most recent piece to catch my eye is this gorgeous Bad Kitty Corset Paddle.

Bad Kitty Corset Paddle Red Side

Though I avoid lingerie like the plague these days (fuck these body image issues), I always pause whenever I see a picture of a woman wearing a corset. I adore the femininity of them, the way they emphasise curves and conceal flaws. They’re powerful, sexy, and my favourite colour combo is black on red. Those are the colours of my personal fave bedroom outfit; red corset with black panels and black lacing, and matching shoes. It’s the only one I bought in a bigger size when I gained weight. Continue reading “Bad Kitty Corset Paddle”