Seaside

Like the big kid he is, Dominic tosses a short plank onto the bonfire. The girls clustered nearby give him the stank-eye as they dance away from flying sparks. He laughs maniacally, racing to the water’s edge and back again with a sopping wet bunch of seaweed in his hand, laughing louder when the girls’ irritated sighs turn to screams of disgust.

The thought that I should probably tell my best friend to wind it in a bit crosses my mind, but I don’t. I don’t even give him more than a distracted tongue click when he lobs the soggy seaweed in my direction. I’m far too busy watching Stefan watching Lisa to care much about Dom’s attention whoring. Continue reading “Seaside”

Elust 105

Elust 105 Header Mrs Fever

Photo courtesy of Mrs Fever

Welcome to Elust 105

The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it’ll be here at Elust. Want to be included in Elust #106 Start with the rules, come back May 1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

~ This Month’s Top Three Posts ~

I lost my sexuality for a year.

Stolen Penis

Bright English Mornings

~ Featured Post (Molly’s Picks) ~

Flavour of Femme

She Teaches Sex Ed!

~Readers Choice from Sexbytes ~

Katy

*You really should consider adding your popular posts here too*
All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy! Continue reading “Elust 105”

Oh, Lola

Lola is being a brat.

Her office is closed today. She wants me to stay home with her and I can’t, so she’s acting up.

First, it was pouting. Those soft lips of hers, tinted pink, puckering into a perfect little rosebud while her chin dimpled, and her Wedgewood blue eyes glittered with tears. She has this way of inclining her head and looking up at me through her dolly lashes. It looks innocent enough, but the way she pulls her arms in and leans forward so I follow the line of her eyes, to her pout, to her cleavage reveals it for what it is.

Manipulative little so-and-so. Every other time I’ve seen her pull that trick I’ve grabbed her and kissed her breathless, so why she thought it would work today is anybody’s guess. Continue reading “Oh, Lola”

Hot Octopuss ATOM

If there’s one sex toy that’s seriously underused at Scandarella House it would be the vibrating cock ring. Call me selfish, but I rarely get anything from them, so I think, what’s the point? Not cool, really, given that the Fella really likes them. But when one of his favourite brands releases one there’s no way would I get away with not giving it a go. That’s why I’m sat here writing about the Hot Octopuss ATOM.

Like I said, the Fella loves his Hot Octopuss stuff. I didn’t get along with my Queen Bee as much as I wanted to, though. The troubles I had with that toy run along a similar vein to those I have with vibrating cock rings. Continue reading “Hot Octopuss ATOM”

Doppelgänger

“You using, lying, sack of shit! Don’t ever come near me again!”

Helena – aka my suddenly ex-best friend – picked up the skirts of her saloon girl dress and stalked away, leaving me standing there gawping after her like I was having an attack of the dumbs. Everyone at the faculty fancy dress party was staring at me like I’d just announced I had a tail, but they had to know that the woman was batshit crazy. I hadn’t laid a finger on her and had no intentions of ever doing so.

Drunkenly telling our friends that I’d eaten her out like a starving man eats cake was bad enough, but telling them right in front of me was even worse! I mean, I’d never even seen a pussy let alone put my face in one. Cock I’d been up close and personal with, and I’d had more than one butt banquet in my lifetime, but pussy was as foreign to me as Frenchmen. Continue reading “Doppelgänger”

Vain Toys Mister Vain Dildo

If you’ve been around blogs, sex toy Twitter, or sex shop forums, you’ve probably been asked the following question; if you could only use one type of toy for the rest of your life, what would it be? I used to hesitate when faced with this query, but not now. Now I pretty much scream DILDOS then go on a panicked dildo buying spree. I love all kinds of dildos, but the best kind are the ones that are made especially for me. Colours, sizes, firmness, vac-u-lock holes, cumtubes, suction cups… It’s all customisable and bloody wonderful. The latest ‘made for me’ dildo to join my collection is the glorious Mister Vain Dildo by Vain Toys.

Vain Toys is a young, Denmark based company that makes lovely silicone dildos and butt plugs in a huge array of colours. Every step of the process, from sketching to pouring, is done in-house. While the shapes and sizes of each piece are non-negotiable, the rest is up to the customer. Once I’d made my choices, I had my dildo in my grabby hands within probably a week and a half. Speedy, and discreetly packaged, too. Continue reading “Vain Toys Mister Vain Dildo”

The Weekly Wank – #30DayOrgasmFun

#30DayOrgasmFun is a week in and I’ve had the house to myself for most of it so it’s been easy to grab some masturbation time. And it’s been a good week for orgasms. Mostly. There were a couple of days when the very thought of touching my clit made me groan in much the same way I would if someone asked me to climb a mountain. But the rest of the week saw me getting down and dirty with myself every day.

Wanna know how I did? Here you go: Continue reading “The Weekly Wank – #30DayOrgasmFun”

You2Toys Diamond Silicone Plug

Does your butt love a bit of bling? Yeah, mine does too. A friend of mine recently said that she thinks sparkly based butt plugs are going out of fashion. I called bullshit with a lot more intensity than the situation called for. But when you have stuff like this little gem – the You2Toys Diamond Silicone Plug from Orion – in your toy cupboard, it’s hard not to get defensive of a trend that’s still going strong.

One of my favourite things about this plug is its base. So many plugs I see when browsing through online toy shops (which is something I spend an inordinate amount of time doing) have bases that I wouldn’t consider anal safe. Squishy rings that ain’t ever stopping full insertion. Round bases that are the same size of or smaller than the bulb. And the worst of the worst, bases that are only marginally bigger than the neck of the toy. Continue reading “You2Toys Diamond Silicone Plug”

Satisfyer PRO 2 Next Generation

Hmmm, the Satisfyer PRO 2 Next Generation. I’ve had this thing sat in my review cupboard for ages. When it was first launched I was full of enthusiasm about it. But after reviewing a load of Satisfyer models and finding that I prefer Womanizer, I’m ashamed to admit that my interest in Satisfyer fell by the wayside.

But…

I found myself in need of some air pulse orgasms and the only thing I had to hand that didn’t have a flat as fuck battery was the PRO 2 Next Gen. Out it came, and then I came. Over. And over. And then once more just because. I realised then that I’d sold this thing short. I’d been mean. I’d put off using it (and therefore this review) in favour of using other suction toys. It didn’t deserve that from me, and neither did Peepshow Toys, who sent me the thing to review in the first place. Peepshow, I apologise. Continue reading “Satisfyer PRO 2 Next Generation”

Secret Play Oceanic Wakame & Nori Lubricant

I love sex toys. Not the most shocking of revelations, I know, but I do. I love them the way the Fella loves cars. He can wax lyrical about the shape of a headlight for hours on end, just as I can the shape of a vibrator. He often oooohs over the metallic finish of a paint job, and I do the same thing over the marbling of a hand-poured silicone dildo. But, in all fairness, sex toys aren’t vital to healthy, satisfying sex or masturbation. In my opinion, the only thing that is vital to good lovin’ is lube, and the most recent one to go a few laps around my bedroom is the Secret Play Oceanic Wakame & Nori Lubricant from Latex, Leather & Lace.

Another non-shocker is my love affair with Sliquid. It’s my go-to brand cos it’s easily accessible and there’s a type for pretty much every sex act I can think to perform. Well, apart from fisting. But I’m always on the lookout for something new. Something that comes close to Sliquid. Continue reading “Secret Play Oceanic Wakame & Nori Lubricant”